A quick thought about inner confidence and self-esteem.

There’s a lot of advice out there that tries to regulate and transform your inner world/emotions. Write daily affirmations. Meditate. Have gratitude, celebrate small wins throughout the day (however small).

I think having a baseline level of self-acceptance is good, but my experience is that it’s super limited. If you stare at a mirror and tell yourself that you’re awesome, it’ll be true to an extent, but there is no real, material basis to point to.

Over the last couple of months in particular I’ve been setting hard but achievable goals for myself. Crush it at work. Eat healthy and proportionate. Exercise an hour day. Speak my truth, know what I have to say is valuable, never lie (even by omission).

For me that’s where true inner confidence comes from; I know I’m truly pursuing the inner work when I can see that it has manifested in my daily actions. Then I can see it becomes real. Works both ways, even: I know I am developing self-esteem and confidence because I can point to all the hard goals I’ve accomplished over a long period of time.

Self-love without massive, sustained action only gets you so far.

Put another way, is your self-love a performance done out of desperation? Or a “being” born of inspiration? If it’s a true “being,” then that should manifest into sustained real-world behavior.